“You have a lot of potential.”
“They show the potential to be good.”
“Someday they will reach their full potential.”
These are words that I’m sure everybody has heard at least once, and it is most often used as a compliment. Teachers, coaches, bosses, and even peers use these all the time to show praise for a colleague whether it be in sports or the workplace. I’ve always seen the word used to give someone feedback for how much promise they show in their line of work, what they could be eventually, and I’ve also seen people who receive that kind of praise and get a false sense of accomplishment and abilities which leads them to think they have done and are doing enough to achieve what they want. In reality, you are not.
When I was younger, I was always told to take the word “potential” as almost an insult or a backhanded compliment. To take it as someone saying, “you’re pretty good, but not good enough”. But I feel as if I’m the one person who sees it this way. Too many times I’ve seen the effect be a sense of confidence of what they COULD be, when in reality what you could be is not what you are. Sure, being able to understand what you could do is important, but the word makes too many people feel good about nothing. And the more I think about it, the more I realize that people absolutely love the idea that they could do something, without ever realizing if they would be able to or not.
A common scenario I see and hear about a lot involves men and sports they used to play. For example, “I could have probably played Division 1 football and made it to the NFL if I didn’t have to stop playing because of my injuries in High School. I was really good and my coaches told me I had the potential to be a great player.” I’m sure there is someone out in the world that has a story like this that they fantasize about regularly. Just the thought of them possibly being able to do something like that keeps them going and happy, and that’s why those people are mediocre. Having the potential to do or be something is nowhere near the same as someone who has done it or is it.
Potential is a big fat lie. Potential makes you believe that you can or could’ve done something, that in reality you can’t. It makes you think you’re better than you actually are, and leaves room for excuses explaining away why you weren’t able to. Potential means you’re not good enough right now, and if you don’t make the changes to become better and continue to grow, when the next year comes around you will still not be good enough. If you ever hear someone refer to you as being somebody with “Potential”, you should take that negatively to heart and work to make sure you are the person that can do something as opposed to the person that could possibly be able to do something. Having the potential to be a running back that rushes for 2,000 yards in a season doesn’t mean a thing when you only rush for 500 yards every year.
Potential does not equate to value. So work to become valuable and you will find success.
But wait, there’s more!
Potential doesn’t just affect you in regards to who you are and what you can do, it can affect you in whom or what you see potential in. And that can have the same dire consequences as well. While you should see potential as a negative when its aimed at you, you must also see potential for what it is when you find yourself placing it on other people, things, or situations. Like stated early, potential is basically a nice way of saying you aren’t good enough. So place that same viewpoint on other things and it changes your view of what you originally thought about it.
A big example of this, which has affected me negatively as well, is people staying in relationships they shouldn’t be in because that person has or shows the POTENTIAL to be a good partner or spouse. So it keeps you around because your vision is clouded by what could be, because it could be everything you want, but it isn’t. That person shows flashes of what you want, but they will never be what you’re looking for because the entirety of the existence in your life is because of potential. If you stop seeing things and people through you “potential goggles”, and see them for who and what they really are right in front of you, you wont be letting yourself down over and over again because you see more out of them then they wish to be or even are able to be. To make at as simple and materialistic as possible, it’s like having a Ford Ranger because it has the potential to be a solid work truck, but you really need an F-150. The Ranger will never be able to do what you actually need it to do.
So in conclusion, always strive to be of value and search for valuable components for you life, and not the potential of them or yourself to be valuable. Make decisions with what is present, not what might be there when its all said and done.